If you have "no place to go," come here!

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America: Land of the free (TM)

Limited time offer. Only valid for properly dressed and paying customers and if accompanied with an order. Void where prohibited. Not applicable in airports and other public places. Only one unit per family. Batteries not included. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Subject to approval. No user-serviceable parts inside. All rights reserved. Additional restrictions may apply.

If offer does not apply to you, please, just fuck off.

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